The reason I am bringing this up is because my friend Taylor had her first kiss with this one guy that I personally don't want her to date. One: Because we're 13. Two: I am soooooo afraid she is going to get hurt. Three: She is rushing things whether she wants to admit or not. What does this have to do with my dreams? Well I am nothing like my friend when it comes to relationships. I want to tell her my reason but I just can't. My life is soo complicated and it has affected the way I think about people and certain situations. I haven't told anyone about my life because.. well because I don't want pity. I will tell Taylor someday because she deserves to know why I act so weird. But of course it won't be any time soon. I think she knows I have been through pain but I think she is to afraid to ask. My life has hurt me in so many ways but I don't ever want to go back. I don't want to put my kids through that pain. I will probably be a push over mom hehehe. I hope I meet a guy who will make a lot of decisions cause I can't make decisions to save my life! There I am going off track again.. Dang ADD!! Any way my life has just made me push that much harder to become someone. I want a great life when I get older. I know that I will have problems but I also know that I will keep going. I found an amazing quote that really says it all: It doesn't matter where you're coming from. All that matters is where your going. Pretty deep eh? I am usually not like this in real life. Actually everything I say on here is from my heart and this is just barely skimming the top. The sad part is half the people I know don't even know some of this stuff. I guess I am on here so I can just write it down. I mean I'm not saying every possible detail.
Well I think that was enough drama for today!! I hope all your dreams come true and that whatever has or will happen just to let you know that I have and still feel that. And I promise that someday it will get better. I just have to keep telling myself that...
Much Love,
~JaImE~ <3